Rube Roustabout

Well holy shitballs, people, we may have found a rival to Brian. This super-rube, uncovered by Rube Watch today, displays the characteristics of each Rube to have already entered the Hall. Like Brian, he proclaims his turgid righteousness, puffing his chest like a red white and blue peacock on heat in that foggy world of theirs. Like Jeremy, he is older than the usual spotty pubescent rubes we discover, and should, by all manner of reason, know much, much better. And like each of them, he displays such ineptitude with the English language that his articles are used to make blind, retarded kids in Vietnam feel better about their short stories.

But how did we discover such a creature, such a hybrid of so many rube-skills? If ever you feel the need, but we urge you not to, lest you bite thine own lips off and swallow them in anger, visit the Young Conservatives website. There you will find all manner of rubic activity. Please be careful. It was at this chamber pot of rubey bullshit that we found “Peacenik Puffery” by Gene Koprowski. Now, we shan’t go into the depths of what is so very off with this article; the lack of fact, the misguided conclusions, the poor grammar and worse mathematics. Just sit forward and read, but no matter how much you squint, yes, he is saying that. Truly, although frightening and rather saddening really, making one tilt one’s head sideways and think “ah bless”, we present this example not only to further show you Rubes in action, but to make you feel just great about yourself.

Gene, on foot of what we’ve read so far, Gene, we say…Welcome…Gene.

Oh yeah, Gene? Hey…Gene? Yeah…e.g. means "for example".